Victims Information Bureau of Suffolk

RELATIONSHIP VIOLENCE:
What is holding your relationship together? love or fear?

A loving relationship is based on trust and support. Each partner tries to understand the other's experiences and feels free to express her or his needs. Abusive relationships can start like healthy ones - full of love, excitement and romance. As time goes on, what once felt loving or flattering starts to feel controlling or even frightening.

LOVE

FEAR

Good communication	Excessive jealousy
Sharing thoughts and feelings	Name calling, humiliation
Having friends and interests outside the relationship	Possessiveness
Trust and respect	Violence - hitting, forced sex, intimidation, shouting

Anyone could be a victim of dating or relationship violence. It doesn't matter if you are rich or poor, gay or straight.

In unhealthy relationships the physical or emotional abuse may not happen all the time. Abuse may happen in a pattern that can be hard to recognize. Even if your partner has been violent only a few times it is still abuse. Over time the violence usually gets worse.

It is sometimes hard to leave a violent relationship because of feelings of guilt, denial, love or hope that things will get better.

If someone you love is hurting you, VIBS can help. Click here or call 631-360-3606.






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	"I was so scared and confused. I thought it was only happening to me." - Jennifer, age 16.